As you can imagine, if you read last week’s retro I had to make some changes this week. So I did.
We had another work outing this week: our org got to take in a Twins day game on Thursday. I had a blast. I spent most of it talking to my MN-based teammates, ignoring the game, and honestly just having a great time. Later that afternoon, though, after getting home, I felt sadder than I did last week. People say they’re feeling blue, but I think I understood what that means for the first time ever. This awful mix of heartbreak and grief. It was overwhelming, and by Friday, I was really down.
The first thing I did was start looking for a therapist. Reading their profiles on their websites, finding one that sounded good, then learning they weren’t “in-network” for my insurance company. Eventually I managed to find someone close to my house—I can walk there—and scheduled an appointment for next week. I’m looking forward to it.
This weekend I got out of my comfort zone and went to a pickup game of Mojo Kickball. I won’t get into too much detail, but it’s basically kickball, dodgeball, and hot potato all rolled into one. It sounds chaotic, and it is chaotic.
I was so nervous before I left. I was in full-on flight mode, ready to run and hide. I felt like I was going to throw up. My hands were shaking. But, I went. And when I got there it was an immediately welcoming place. They’ve got a good system for when newbies show up: pairing them with buddies to learn the rules, having everyone play a slowed-down version of the game before the real games begin, and having rules that make sure beginners have fun and don’t leave never wanting to come back. They give you tasks for sideline jobs like timekeeping and whatnot. Mine was to ring the cowbell that signifies the quarter has ended.
It was super fun. I am sore today in places I didn’t know I could get sore. It was more athletic than I anticipated, but not overly so. Thankfully, due to my Peloton rides I’m in decent cardio shape—though maybe not in as good shape as I thought! I’m gonna go back. I don’t know yet that it’s the place I’ll stay or where I’ll make a friend, but I’m going back.
I guess in a sense this checks the “go play games with people I don’t know” goal off my list, so that’s a bonus. That was the original intent of that goal: getting out of my comfort zone, getting over nerves, and meeting new people. I’ll take it.
Things I enjoyed this week
- Emily Catalano’s new comedy special, fittingly called “The Introvert”, was what I needed this week. We saw her here in Minneapolis earlier this year, so we knew some of the material, but it’s still great. If you’re a fan of dry, deadpan humor, check it out.